If you want to move beyond poor body image and toward body respect, here are three things you can do to start a fresh, new relationship with your body.
In today's society, finding someone who genuinely loves their body is a rare gem. Too rare. What is not rare, however, are the billions of dollars that the Bikini Industrial Complex is making off of our perpetual dissatisfaction. And I don't know about you, but that really makes me angry.
I understand why body-hate is so easy. I've been in that trap one too many times. If we mentally punish ourselves enough, just maybe we'll stop doing "x, y, and z" and start doing "a, b, and c" instead.
Unfortunately, the lie here is that you can't hate doesn't affect sustainable change.
So why not try something different?
1. Commit to Acceptance.
Taking the train from Hate Town to Love Town requires a stopover in a nice, quaint place called Acceptance Town. Here, tolerating is the name of the game. That's exactly what acceptance is, choosing to tolerate the situation in the moment.
You have to make an inner commitment, every day (multiple times a day) to accept your body, right now, just as it is.
Committing to accepting something doesn't automatically mean you are accepting it, but it puts you on the right path. You might be thinking, "But what if I really need my body to change?" Look, acceptance doesn't mean change can't happen. In fact, Carl Jung described it beautifully when he said, "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change." Yet we often seek change that isn't driven by love, but by fear and loathing.
2. Challenge Evasive Actions
People with poor body image often go to great lengths to avoid facing their bodies or revealing their "defects" to themselves or others. Maybe you insist on wearing a T-shirt when you swim, or perhaps you won't let yourself slouch in a chair, fearing the feeling of your stomach rolls (which are 100% normal, by the way). Do you avoid a certain kind of clothing like the plague? All of these are evasive maneuvers to avoid the body or any judgment of it.
Begin to recognize the ways you may be avoiding certain places, people, or situations because of your body. Once you know your little tricks, choose one to challenge for a week, or maybe just a day. Desensitize yourself slowly for best results.
3. Create a Nurturing Environment
Your body is susceptible to the ways you treat it, both physically and mentally. Body respect, which I believe is a much more realistic goal than body positivity, evolves from respectful thoughts (whether or not you believe these yet) and nurturing actions (gentle touch, luxurious lotions, etc.).
Creating a nurturing environment opens the door for powerful, lasting shifts in your relationship with your body.
Here are some environmental factors that are not nurturing to the body:
- clothing that doesn't fit or is uncomfortable
- fashion magazines or other content that makes you feel bad about yourself
- Instagram influencers or hashtags that promote body dissatisfaction to sell you stuff
- Gross-tasting diet food you make yourself eat
- Exercise that isn't enjoyable or causes you harm
- Weight-loss supplements that wreak internal havoc
We don't have to be satisfied with a terrible or even mediocre relationship with our bodies. Body respect, acceptance, tolerance, and maybe even one day like or love can truly be yours.
✨ Josie Munroe, LMFT is a licensed therapist and owner of JosieMunroe.com and Your Sensitive Recovery As a recovered clinician and Highly Sensitive Person, she loves supporting others on their journeys to form new, empowered relationships with food, their bodies, and their sensitivity. Join the newsletter for a weekly boost of hope and inspiration. You deserve a recovery that works for you! ✨